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Reviewed by Reviewed by Brad Beeman , Minister of Family Life and Teaching at First United Methodist Church in Santa Monica, CA. Prior to ministry he served on a White House task force on “Parenting as Prevention.” The Switching Hour : Kids of Divorce Say Good-Bye Again The Switching Hour is that somewhat anguished period of time, that period of difficult and often uncomfortable “hello’s” and “goodbye’s” as a child moves between the home of one divorced parent to the home of another. The Switching Hour is a resource that is needed and long overdue. I remember walking from the softball fields here in Santa Monica and suddenly hearing the screams of a ten-year-old friend of my daughter. We dropped what we were carrying and ran, believing that she was in danger. What we witnessed was totally unexpected. This beautiful young ten-year-old was being physically pulled between her two parents. They were screaming at each other and, as her parents screamed, this little girl was sobbing hysterically. She was being torn apart on many levels. Neither parent seemed to notice. Those of us that sought to help were overwhelmed. I am deeply aware that this scene is at the far end of the spectrum of divorced parents and our children. What it reveals, however, is how often we seem to ignore the issues that surround this movement, this tugging of children between one parent and another. Dr.Evon Flesberg raises the plethora of issues surrounding children of divorce, and does it with great sensitivity, integrity, grace and faith. Each chapter is led off by a note from a child to a parent, grandparent or loved one. With each note we are introduced to the depth of feeling often experienced by our children in these transitional times. Each chapter is written as an interaction between the author and those she is seeking to serve, and is often done from the perspective of the child. The interplay works and works well. The book is written in beautiful and understandable language with titles like, “The Hour I Wait and Long For,” “The Hour I Hope Comes, But Does Not,” and “The Hour I Wish Wouldn’t Come.” Then, toward the end she offers a variety of perspectives, sometimes literally, helping readers come to terms with our potential roles in the midst of this ever growing phenomenon. On the inside of the front sleeve, Linda Ranson Jacobs writes, “Besides parents experiencing a divorce, The Switching Hour should be read by every teacher, counselor, childcare worker, minister, judge, lawyer, and social worker.” I could not agree more. As a pastor who deals with hundreds of families I would say to every pastor who counsels parents, works with children or youth, or who has a staff that interacts with families, offer this book as a gift. Place it in the hands of every divorced parent. Place it in the hands of every parent. It truly is a gift on many levels. My only question: Dr. Flesberg – please come out with a workbook that would coincide. That too would be a great help. This book is a gift. May it continue to gain a broad-based readership.
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