Holier Than Thou: When Faith Becomes Toxic, by Ergun Mehmet Caner

Abingdon Press, 2009
ISBN 9780687658404
$15.00… 30% discount until Nov. 1, 2009… $10.50

A cursory reading of Holier Than Thou is a stroll through familiar territory. It is a diagnosis of bad behavior in most normal congregations in mainline Protestant churches in America. Caner rightly asserts that toxic behavior is a virulent poison that undermines and sometimes destroys peace and harmony in the church. The stories he tells are painfully common, and congregational leaders will find themselves nodding their heads as they encounter in Caner’s tales a host of people they are certain they have met before.

Yet, while many readers will resonate with the many shocking and disappointing illustrations of toxic behavior in the church, the book is woefully empty of any practical advice on what to do about them. There is a dissatisfying, simplistic formula to each chapter: highlight a type of toxic behavior, look for snippets of scripture that illuminate what Jesus taught about such behavior, and then conclude with the advice to stop doing toxic things because Jesus said so. Even this formula is a bit confusing, because Caner tells a story of bad behavior he has encountered, looks to scripture for guidance, and then refers to himself and the reader as those who need to change their behavior. It makes one wonder who this book is written for? Those who act in toxic ways are unlikely to read it. Those who deal with congregational toxicity are likely to pick it up, but there is nothing overly helpful for them to use from the resource. In many ways it feels like a sympathy book – Caner is someone who understands what pastors and laity leaders go through, but doesn’t really know what to do about it.

There is a deep, albeit warranted, cynicism in this small book. Caner equates toxic people to Pharisees, specifically focusing on their abuses of power and their disregard for the teachings of Jesus the Christ. However, even here there is a problem. Caner makes absolutely no distinction between the ignorant, the spiritually immature, the socially inept, the intentionally malicious, and the pathologically ill. Toxic is as toxic does. The illustrations are all over the place – and it makes no difference at all whether someone is actively trying to be mean-spirited and divisive or is merely oblivious to their own poor behavior. Some of the stories indicate the need for some serious remedial and decisive action; others simply point to teaching moments where leaders need to step up, name the bad behavior, and deal with it in loving and gentle ways.

There is little grace in this book, and little hope for redemption. In one of the few truly prescriptive quotes, Caner writes, “Every church is filled with three types of members: Sheep, Goats, and Wolves. A true leader has three responsibilities: Love the Sheep, Convert the Goats, and Kill the Wolves.” Unfortunately, as explained above, there is no real distinction between goats and wolves, so a lot of goats end up slaughtered. At no point in the book is there any kind of encouragement or advice for how to convert the goats. The message throughout the book is clear: if you engage in toxic behavior, cut it out. But anyone who has ever tried to change a bad habit knows how successful such an approach is. True transformation takes time, takes practice, takes encouragement, requires accountability, and works best in community. None of this is offered in the book. The solutions, such as they are, are do not engage in toxic behavior, and do not associate with those who do.

The book offers a specifically individualistic worldview – there is little mention of the role of the community of faith. Systems theory would say that such bad, toxic behavior in a congregation required a long period of complicity and an almost complete abdication of responsibility to challenge such behaviors in the past. It would ask the question, “How have we gotten to this place?” rather than blaming individuals. Certainly, people behave in toxic and unacceptable ways, but only if they are allowed to get away with it. What Caner describes – in my mind – is something much more than a few poisonous people acting inappropriately. What he offers evidence of is a systemic problem whereby we do not speak the truth in love, we do not put the good of the many before the rights and preferences of individuals, and we do not hold each other accountable for our actions.

Holier Than Thou is an incomplete story. It does a credible job of diagnosing the problem, but it offers no advice on any kind of solution. We all know there is poison in the ecclesial well. What we need is the wisdom and guidance to clean it up, so that the living water that springs forth brings life, not sickness and disease.